Japanese Lessons

My mom loves my husband. It's pretty annoying, actually, because if given a chance to take sides, my mother almost inevitably sticks up for Matt. I think that she loves that she can put him to work. One day, when we had only been dating for about 15 minutes, Matt came over to the house to pick me up, and my mom told him to move bags of fertilizer from her car to the garden, and then grabbed a ladder and a paintbrush and made him touch up some paint on the ceiling. My mom is about 4' 10", while Matt is 6'1". It's pretty great to watch her order him around. While he was always a complete suck up, a la Eddie Haskell (what am I, 67 years old? I'll have to work on my references), he followed through with action. In mom's eyes, Matt can do no wrong and it's a good thing he married me since I am the root of all that is wild and evil in this world. (My parents think I had WAY more fun in high school than I actually did. I made up for it after graduation, but it really sucks to be punished for NOT partying all of the time!)


They're both standing in this picture.


One night, Matt and I were in bed, having our late night, pre-sleep chatter. I decided to teach Matt the few Japanese phrases that I learned from my mother. It's common knowledge now, that children are actually at an advantage if they learn multiple languages from infancy, but my mom worried that my brother and I would have a hard time in school if she spoke Japanese to us. Most of my Japanese vocabulary comes from picking up bits and pieces of my mom's phone calls with her friends and family.

To demonstrate my lesson to Matt, I had a mock phone conversation with some admittedly hilarious voices to differentiate the three characters. I play myself, my mom, and a friend who is calling for my mom.

Ring ring ring

Me: (answers) Moshi-moshi! (hello!)
Friend: Konichiwa, Kimiko-san? (Hi, Kimiko?)
Me: Choto matte, kudasai. (Hold on, please)Click on the link for the cutest website to learn some basic Japanese phrases.
Friend: Hai, Arigato. (Yes, thank you.)
Me: Mom, phone!!! (Me, calling my mom to pick up- oh wait, I think you got that.)
Mom:(picks up phone)Moshi-moshi?

I shared a little more of my very limited knowledge that night, certain that my droning list of Japanese words and phrases was sending Matt to sleep. I counted to ten, told him how to say rice (gohan), and told him the things my mom would say when she was angry! I made the mistake of telling him that if I was bad, my mom might threaten to "spank my oshiri."

During my cousin's visit last week, I told my mother that I taught Matt a little bit of Japanese. She was thrilled so I told Matt to tell my mom what he had learned.

"Domo arigato, oshiri". Um, yeah. "Thanks, Ass."

My mom, for the first time, was pissed at my husband. She told him that is not the right way to speak and she was visibly disgusted. He was making a joke of her culture! Crude American! While I didn't realize it would be quite that offensive, I figured I should change the subject and enjoy my elevated status as her child who would never say such a thing.

The next night, my parents took the family out for dinner. Everyone thanked my mom and dad for the meal. Mr. Suck-Up-Pants, winked at my mother and said, "Domo arigato, gozaimasu. Gochisosama." Her eyes actually welled up with tears as she said, "that's a good boy."

What an oshiri-kisser.

Tourist in my own town

I just had a really great four-day weekend with my parents, my cousin Robin, her husband Brad, and their children, Korey and Cody. They are visiting from Pennsylvania for a few days and I wanted to show them around some of my favorite local (and "local-ish") spots.

On Saturday evening, we drove to the Naval Academy and strolled through City Dock in Annapolis. While the sun was setting, we each enjoyed an ice cream cone and watched a young couple playing traditional Irish music on violins. City Dock is very charming with the boats on the horizon and the great variety of dogs walking their masters. I wish I took a photo of the great Mastiffs that we saw, lounging by the water. Giant teddy bears.

On Sunday morning, my cousin, her family, my parents, and Matt and I, took the Metro to the Smithsonian stop in DC. We wandered through the monuments and the memorials while it was still cool in the morning.


I was very disappointed when my camera died after about seven shots. There were some great photo opportunities that day! My cousin's daughter got a great shot at the WWII Memorial of a duck bathing by a fountain with a backdrop of bronze stars from the wall behind her. While we were walking by the Washington Monument, we saw the President's Marine One Choppers fly right above us, heading towards The White House. My mom and I may have been the only adults excited by the proximity to President Obama.

Anyhow, after the memorials, the seven of us went to the Smithsonian Museum of American History. We spent the day admiring the Star Spangled Banner, Dorothy's ruby slippers, Kermit the Frog, and the First Ladies' gowns. My cousin's nine-year-old son impressed me with his knowledge of military history as we walked through exhibits featuring the Manhattan Project and the Gulf War.

On Monday morning, we took the Metro once again, into Arlington, Virginia.


We visited the gravesites of President Kennedy, Robert F. Kennedy, and the Tomb of the Unknown.

I took a moment to read some of the tombstones and appreciate the life of the person buried beneath. To see thousands and thousands of tombs behind each one that we read was chilling and heartbreaking. I appreciate the sacrifice of those who fight for our country; but it is sobering to see hills and hills of white markers tallying the cost of freedom. We watched a soldier leading a black horse to a burial. I thought about the possibility that the person being buried could be an 85 year old WWII vet or a 20 year old, just back from Iraq or Afghanistan.


As we walked back towards the metro station, I wondered if anyone would be interested in stopping by the Women In Military Service For America Memorial. I reminded everyone that we could rehydrate with some water from the gift shop, and led them through the displays featuring the groundbreaking women who dared to break the glass ceiling of the Armed Forces.

After the cemetery, we decided to lighten the mood with visits to the Natural History Museum and the Air and Space Museum. This museum is probably more kid-friendly with the dinosaurs, animals, and gems.


We were kind of kicked out of the Air and Space Museum as they were hosting a NASA party for the 40th anniversary of man landing on the moon, but the kids had enough time to enjoy some space shuttles and airplanes before we hopped on the Metro and headed back to the house.

Yesterday, we decided to stay more local and we took a trip to the Inner Harbor in Baltimore. Another beautiful evening was spent perusing the gift shops and admiring the view of Federal Hill. I know that my fellow Baltimoreans may wonder why I didn't spend more time in Charm City... The O's were out of town, the Ravens are off for the summer, and we were all pretty tired from my Griswoldian itineraries of the previous days. Maybe when the kids are older, I can show them around B'more.

Today, I returned to work while the family ventured out to Ocean City. I can't wait to hear about their thoughts of the beach town, compared to the Jersey Shore that they would usually visit.

I hope that Robin, Brad, and the kids had as much fun as my parents, Matt, and I did. It's amazing to take a look at your own backyard through the eyes of out-of-town guests, and better yet when those guests are beloved family members.


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I'm a guest blogger!!

There is a blog that I read called A Dog's Beach. Jennifer Wilbur posts photos of her dogs and all of their puppy pals, romping around a great dog beach in San Diego. Since I love dogs and dream of San Diego, this blog is a nice little escape for me to check out while I'm at the office.

Jennifer asked her readers to send in stories and photos of their own dogs and their respective beaches and I am very honored to be the first guest blog featured on her site!

You can check out the whole site on the link above, but if you're getting to this post in the future, here's the direct link to my submission!